This past week gave me the opportunity to conduct my first final exams from the teacher's perch. I must say that they were significantly more enjoyable for me than for the students, though the students appeared to be having fun between nervous giggles and voice quivers. Some students suffered from what I have come to call "Verbal Lawn-mowing": "I can--I can--I can--I can--I can..." But most were confident if not perspicacious. I also judged an English contest at Hu Jin Tao's high school. This was quite the formal affair that yielded significant financial reward for minimal work. Both experiences provided me with quite a few laughs at and with students. For better and worse, I saw just how much pressure students experience with regards to results-based activities. So, herein are the highlights to end my first semester as a university teacher--a highly enjoyable semester that I will summarize better in an a later post.
People that my students think are "famourse" (followed by the number of impersonators):
I was a little surprised to see Oprah show-up on the list, and I was a bit curious as to why more Chinese historical figures did not. This list reveals a few cultural insights through who makes the cut and who does not, but I am most interested in the penetration of American pop-culture into a "closed" society.
A depressing insight: China has abysmal taste in popular music. I would acknowledge those who believe Taylor Swift to be worthy of popularity, but I am astonished at how university students are down to jam with Kenny G and sappy love ballads. This phenomenon is indicative of my general disappointment in finding enjoyable Chinese music: I struggle to sit through pretty much any Chinese track.
There was only one painfully stage-frightened student who froze and nearly passed-out from asphyxia before I told her she could give me the presentation in the hall. Many students simply recited their presentations and came off as robotic versions of their celebrities. (Domo! Whoops. Wrong language.) I must admit I truly enjoyed the nervous students who presented Spidermen in completely stone-faced seriousness: "I shoot web from my wrists and scale the slippery walls."
I also learned that Justin Bieber has a security guard named Kenny, that Taylor Swift's favorite color is white (there are many opportunities for jokes there), and that Yao Ming's favorite foods are tomatoes and hot dogs.
Memorable quotes I wish I could hear the actual celebrities say:
"I'm eunuch in the world"--Michael Jackson as castrated by Mushroom (female)
"Life is chocolates in a box."/"And about that that is all I have to say."--Tom Hanks' Forest Gump quotes butchered by Gump (male)
"Every morning, I look in the mirror and say: 'You're Lady Gaga, bitch!'"--Lady Gaga done justice by Chrystal (male)
"I would rather be with Mickey than any woman."--Walt Disney perversion by Hedy (female)
"I'm a social boy."--Justin Beiber channeling Pinocchio through Jane (female)
"I am old, so I forget: How many movies have I been in?"--Tom Hanks unsympathetically displayed by Henry (male)
"I was discovered by Scott Bakula."--Robot Taylor Swift processed by Katherine (female)
"Some people call me 'The Black Member.'"--Kobe "Black Mamba" Bryant promoted by Koala (female)
"I have a pure love for children."--Michael Jackson unintentionally slandered by Ludovic (female)
"No play and all work will make Jack a dull boy."--Hu Jin Tao unimaginably quoted by Patience (female)
"I'm in the Rock and Roll Whore of Fame."--Madonna according to Ivy (female)
"I played for the Hostile Rockets."--Yao Ming vilified by Fay (female)
"In order to be cool, I always wear a read suit."--Spiderman ironically deceived by Oliver (male)
"...the 'Devil Wears Powder'..."--Anne Hathaway's anti-drug campaign promoted by Christy (female)
"I'm crazy about wars."--George W. Bush as remembered by Candy (female)
"I was voted to be the league's Most Fabulous Player."--Kobe "Black Member" Bryant given an ambiguously gay reputation by Heaven (female)
"The most romantic thing he ever did was take me to see 'Do The Right Thing.'"--Michelle Obama (Catherine; female)
"Thank you, Elie, for this opportunity to speak."--Barack Obama
Books, Movies, Music, T.V.: Guns, Germs, and Steel by Diamond, Chairman Mao Would Not Be Amused by Goldblatt; My Neighbor Totoro, Porco Rosso, Hot Fuzz, Beats, Rhymes, and Life, Attack the Block, The Ides of March, Knuckle; "Mary" by Patrick Watson, "Luck of Lucien" by A Tribe Called Quest, "California Soul" by Marlena Shaw, El Camino by The Black Keys, undun by The Roots, "Cmon Talk" by Jarle Bernhoft, Tycho; Avatar: The Last Airbender, Beavis and Butthead, SNL (Tracy Morgan's dancing during the xmas special), Community (Save Greendale).
People that my students think are "famourse" (followed by the number of impersonators):
- Yao Ming (18)
- Taylor Swift (14)
- Jackie Chan (13)
- Hu Jin Tao (10)
- Bill Gates (11)
- Barack Obama (9)
- Kobe Bryant (8)
- Spiderman (8)
- Lady Gaga (8)
- Da Shan (7)
- Justin Bieber (7)
- Michael Jordan (6)
- Walt Disney (6)
- Superman (5)
- Michael Jackson (4)
- Martin Luther King, Jr. (4)
- Mozart (4)
- Steve Jobs (4)
- Beethoven (4)
- Aang (3)
- Angelina Jolie (3)
- George Washington (3)
- Madonna (2)
- Anne Hathaway (2)
- Abraham Lincoln (2)
- Jay Chou (2)
- Beyonce (2)
- Tom Hanks (2)
- William Shakespeare (2)
- Lin Jun Jie (2)
- Sherlock Holmes (1)
- Li Bai/Li Po (1)
- George W. Bush (1)
- Vincent Van Gogh (1)
- Bruce Lee (1)
- Zhou En Lai (1)
- Leonardo DiCaprio (1)
- Allen Iverson (1)
- Chris Lee (1)
- Zhang Shao Han (1)
- Oprah (1)
- Mariah Carey (1)
- Keira Knightley (1)
- Brad Pitt (1)
- Orlando Bloom (1)
- Michelle Obama (1)
I was a little surprised to see Oprah show-up on the list, and I was a bit curious as to why more Chinese historical figures did not. This list reveals a few cultural insights through who makes the cut and who does not, but I am most interested in the penetration of American pop-culture into a "closed" society.
A depressing insight: China has abysmal taste in popular music. I would acknowledge those who believe Taylor Swift to be worthy of popularity, but I am astonished at how university students are down to jam with Kenny G and sappy love ballads. This phenomenon is indicative of my general disappointment in finding enjoyable Chinese music: I struggle to sit through pretty much any Chinese track.
There was only one painfully stage-frightened student who froze and nearly passed-out from asphyxia before I told her she could give me the presentation in the hall. Many students simply recited their presentations and came off as robotic versions of their celebrities. (Domo! Whoops. Wrong language.) I must admit I truly enjoyed the nervous students who presented Spidermen in completely stone-faced seriousness: "I shoot web from my wrists and scale the slippery walls."
I also learned that Justin Bieber has a security guard named Kenny, that Taylor Swift's favorite color is white (there are many opportunities for jokes there), and that Yao Ming's favorite foods are tomatoes and hot dogs.
Memorable quotes I wish I could hear the actual celebrities say:
"I'm eunuch in the world"--Michael Jackson as castrated by Mushroom (female)
"Life is chocolates in a box."/"And about that that is all I have to say."--Tom Hanks' Forest Gump quotes butchered by Gump (male)
"Every morning, I look in the mirror and say: 'You're Lady Gaga, bitch!'"--Lady Gaga done justice by Chrystal (male)
"I would rather be with Mickey than any woman."--Walt Disney perversion by Hedy (female)
"I'm a social boy."--Justin Beiber channeling Pinocchio through Jane (female)
"I am old, so I forget: How many movies have I been in?"--Tom Hanks unsympathetically displayed by Henry (male)
"I was discovered by Scott Bakula."--Robot Taylor Swift processed by Katherine (female)
"Some people call me 'The Black Member.'"--Kobe "Black Mamba" Bryant promoted by Koala (female)
"I have a pure love for children."--Michael Jackson unintentionally slandered by Ludovic (female)
"No play and all work will make Jack a dull boy."--Hu Jin Tao unimaginably quoted by Patience (female)
"I'm in the Rock and Roll Whore of Fame."--Madonna according to Ivy (female)
"I played for the Hostile Rockets."--Yao Ming vilified by Fay (female)
"In order to be cool, I always wear a read suit."--Spiderman ironically deceived by Oliver (male)
"...the 'Devil Wears Powder'..."--Anne Hathaway's anti-drug campaign promoted by Christy (female)
"I'm crazy about wars."--George W. Bush as remembered by Candy (female)
"I was voted to be the league's Most Fabulous Player."--Kobe "Black Member" Bryant given an ambiguously gay reputation by Heaven (female)
"The most romantic thing he ever did was take me to see 'Do The Right Thing.'"--Michelle Obama (Catherine; female)
"Thank you, Elie, for this opportunity to speak."--Barack Obama
Books, Movies, Music, T.V.: Guns, Germs, and Steel by Diamond, Chairman Mao Would Not Be Amused by Goldblatt; My Neighbor Totoro, Porco Rosso, Hot Fuzz, Beats, Rhymes, and Life, Attack the Block, The Ides of March, Knuckle; "Mary" by Patrick Watson, "Luck of Lucien" by A Tribe Called Quest, "California Soul" by Marlena Shaw, El Camino by The Black Keys, undun by The Roots, "Cmon Talk" by Jarle Bernhoft, Tycho; Avatar: The Last Airbender, Beavis and Butthead, SNL (Tracy Morgan's dancing during the xmas special), Community (Save Greendale).
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